Doing nothing isn’t worth much
My family came over to the house last night to watch my dad open his birthday presents. After that, I showed my brother and sister-in-law the new casa.
They left around ten, and I ran out to the Kroger for some laundry detergent and other needs. Bear with me here. This is what I ended up getting:
- 2 bottles of orange juice (no pulp, extra calcium!)
- 2 things of liquid Arm & Hammer laundry detergent
- 2 packages of wheat thins (Kroger savings 62 cents each!)
- 6 “mini” pizzas the kids love so much
- 3 adult pizzas I love so much
- 2 boxes of Diet Pepsi for Katie
- 1 twelve pack of Red Hook Winter Ale for me
With that much stuff, I decided to go to the one cashier and opt out of scanning each item myself. There was one lady in front of me, and she was already paying, so I didn’t think it would take long. But it did.
It turned out she didn’t have enough money to pay for everything in her cart. She looked to be about fifty, and she had a newborn baby with her. Her groceries totaled about forty bucks, compared to my sixty-five dollars of mostly junk.
At first, I was incredibly annoyed. It was getting late, and I just wanted to pay and get home. I thought the lady was trying a scam. I just wanted the cashier to tell her he couldn’t do anything - which of course was the case - and that she needed to set something aside. I was getting pretty annoyed.
They rifled through everything while she tried to explain how she had carefully calculated how much everything would cost and how she knew she could afford it. I started to get less angry and more embarrassed.
Then she settled on the dog food. She had placed a coupon (only good at Kroger) on the dog food, she said, and the cashier had missed it.
Several minutes went by as she, with the aid of the cashier, the store manager, and I, a bit reluctantly, rifled through everything looking for the lost coupon. Obviously, it wasn’t found.
After a nearly interminable wait, the lady told them to keep the dog food and give the coupon, when they found it, to anyone who wanted it.
I sat there staring guiltily at my food, wondering if I should’ve handed over some cash. I doubt I actually had the money - actually, now that I think about it, I know I didn’t. But that’s not the point. But I did have that stupid two dollar bill in my wallet that is there for “good luck” or something, and that might’ve covered it.
Good luck. huh.
What do you do?
I could’ve given her money. But at first I thought she was scamming. Then I could’ve given her money, but I knew it would be out of anger and just to get rid of her. I thought about snapping at her to leave, and almost felt proud at myself for keeping my mouth shut.
So instead, I did nothing. I sat there with my stupid work clothes still on and my college ring and I did nothing. And after she left, I couldn’t move. I still did nothing. And now I’m here, doing nothing.
bleh.
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These moments are more obvious with the abundance of Christmas aren’t they? Especially if you have mixed feelings about the sheer volume of non-green consummerism. But after falling for many scams (sweet trusting face?)I have decided that peoples money stuff is their stuff.
It is very uncomfortable, but I think following your heart is the best way. If you believe in Karma, then there is the idea that this time around that woman is figuring out how to budget. If I consider individuals unique, creative, capable human beings here to learn something, it helps me.
In some ways it would hav been the easier thing to give some money to her cause, but when you solve someone elses problem, they don’t get the satisfaction of learning themselves. Or your own learning just by watching all the many reactions you had by standing next to her through her struggle.
It’s tough. I have stood in line before wandering if I would be declined and have to return groceries to the shelf. It is a uncomfortable position to be in. If you watch closely, about every 4th person in line will pull a credit card out of their wallet that has a picture of an American flag on it. This is a food stamp card. They have an allotment that is put on the card once a month and that is how they fed themselves. The card doesn’t cover everything.
Sometimes knowledge is better than just giving money. There is an organization in town called The Fish Pantry. It provides dry goods and food to families in need with no questions asked. They will actually deliver the food to a person’s house. Perhaps she needed to know about them.
I think about people like her all the time. I cannot save the world but I can’t help but think there has to be a way to bring a more utopian balance to our society where people are not having to worry about having their electricity cut off or where the next bite of food will come from.